Sophistication Enebriation
Why was I not told? Huh? Was there an email that went around, and I wasn’t in the list? Was there a memo, and I’m far too paper-phobe to actually have retrieved it from my pigeon hole?
Has the fact that I haven’t had a smoke since August 17 made me an irritable prick?
Piss off.
Sorry, that slipped out.
What am I banging on about? Well, I forget, but you can be sure that it sucks, blows and probably would have a laxative effect if consumed excessively.
Oh yeah. Sorry. My nicotine-deficiency-induced-Tourettes got the better of me.
On the weekend I attended a farewell party (no Chris, not yours. Another one. I had the worst hangover after your farewell party), and I was informed by other peoples’ words and actions a certain startling fact.
You must be loud, obnoxious, and arrogant to be accepted.
Because the centre of the party seemed to revolve around a group of girls who drank to oblivion, yelled every thought that entered their head to all and sundry, and proclaimed as to why their state of being is somehow more enlightened than others.
And that last one is expressed by slurring, “I’m so much better than everyone”. Convincing, eh?
Or maybe she was being ironic. I dunno. If she was, then she is the master of comedy, and her wit and delivery far surpasses my vague understanding of humour.
“You should just believe and act that you’re so much better than everyone else” one advised another, just before taking another swig of Smirnoff.
I guess confidence is one thing - and yes it is good to be confident - however it seems that it is a blurry and distorted line between confidence and weapons-grade arseholism. Or idiocy-induced-cover-for-your-lack-of-confidence… I dunno. I’m not a psychologist.
The way these girls would interject over every conversation with an overbearing, nasal voice, and opine at length got irritating very quickly.
Maybe I’m getting old, and should accept that people aren’t perfect.
Maybe I’m just as bad as these girls when I’m inebriated, and I don’t remember acting that way (thank God).
Maybe if I had a smoke that night, I might’ve found it amusing.
Oh look, some people may like being around another person who unabashedly claims that they’re of a higher being (I’m not joking) than everyone else. I sincerely hope they have a great time in their world.
But I'll think they're a bunch of philistines.
Is sophistication a dying artform?
I’m currently reading Memoirs of a Geisha (I’m late in reading it, I know) and it paints a disturbing picture of a fine art that is disappearing slowly from the face of the planet. It outlines how the geisha is now more a novelty that belies the years of dedication a geisha commits to her being.
Yes, it is erroneous to compare today’s Australian woman to that of last century’s Japanese artisans, but it still seems (to me) that sophistication is slowly fading, much like chivalry in males.
Is sophistication an archaic notion?
Or maybe this is just indicative of the people I’ve been hanging around… Maybe I should get out more. Oh wait. No. There're smokers out there. Boo! Hiss!
posted by Andy at 5:08 PM
9 files below
Sophistication is foregone by some women in an attempt to appear more equal to men; just as some men dismiss chivalry for being “too cheesy” and a notion that today’s woman does not appreciate. The latter is not true for all.
But I do have to question the company you were keeping that night and whether it was indicative of normal behaviour or alcohol induced frenzy where a group of young (?) women act like men behaving badly. Either case, there’s a lot to be said for self-control and self-respect. Note: I am making no references to your state of inebriation and whether you acted the same way :).
And I doubt if a cigarette would have made you appreciate these women. Would they have made good company minus the alcohol? Or were they just good to look at?
8:47 PM
I guess confidence is one thing - and yes it is good to be confident - however it seems that it is a blurry and distorted line between confidence and weapons-grade arseholism.
Amen, brother.
---X
1:34 AM
The way these girls would interject over every conversation with an overbearing, nasal voice, and opine at length got irritating very quickly.
If the world really is a stage, then loud-mouth interjectors are the hecklers. With a quick wit and sharp tounge they can usually be put in their place and shut up - but yes, it's always hard to argue with morons.
Anyway, as for sophistication, I don't think Australia ever had any. Any perceived sophistication is probably just a leftover from our Pommy friends, or media influence. Australia itself is void of it.
Australia loves to cut down a tall poppy, and what taller poppies are there than "sophisticated" people?
Personally, I'm not worried about a loss of "sophistication". What I am worried about is the decay of manners and common courtesy, which although go hand-in-hand with sophistication, aren't quite the same. We're living in a country where when a door is opened for someone, you get yelled at and called a chauvanistic pig because "women can open their own doors" (happened to me). That's not a lack of sophistication (although that's involved), it's just plain and simple bloody bad manners.
2:05 PM
You can open my door any time. Maybe in your observation of unsophisticated women/men, you were in fact, sophisticated, thereby keeping it alive.
Maturity, life experience and intelligence normally breeds an air of sophistication.
I can only assume these rude, crass people are inbreds where their car, or material possessions are all the 'substance' they have.
4:59 PM
you aren't going to find what you're really looking for in a bar. but if you were indulging yourself, then you were making the most of the situation.
5:53 PM
I only just finished reading that book myself, enjoyed it immensely.
My brain is too fried this Friday afternoon to provide any more of a comment than that.
4:50 PM
Sophistication isn't a dying artform.
It has simply become much more subtle and is not to be found in obvious places.
Sophistication now isn't concerned with showing sophistication. You sense it in those who still possess it. It's everywhere.
If you don't let the Tara Reids wash you over or get anywhere near your face, you find it, quietly infiltrating those who quietly pass by, in those who neither concern themselves with the Tara Reids nor feel a need to even impliedly suggest to others that they possess the fine quality.
Perhaps you were just with the wrong company.
7:53 PM
I think you are correct in assuming that sophistication is a dying art form. Our society as a whole is more acceptable of rude behavior. I think having a good time and being silly (i.e. being adequately inebriated) is great, but there is definitely a line that shoudln't be crossed.
I think today's young woman (I'm 34...I'll classify young as 20-28) does try hard to be considered "equal" to men. What they forget is you can have equality of respect without trying to act like a man.
There is nothing sexier than a confident and classy woman.
10:07 PM
I agree with the consensus that I was with the wrong company that night, however I am saddened to say that this isn't a one-off time. These boisterous try-hards seem to be cropping up more frequently, ie every event I attend: wine fests, parties, any other social event.
I was going to clarify that I think that sophistication isn't something that is clearly defined, as it can be applied across many kinds of people, as long as they exhibit traits that they are comfortable with.
I've seen sophistication within a businesswoman, and with a boho girl.
It's this internal confidence that defines it, that they don't need to try to be loved... or need to resort to other forced tactics to be liked...
they just are liked and loved.
That's what sophistication is to me.
8:22 AM
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