Obligatory Rant on Mobiles (Celphones ["Cell phones"])

Bracketed segments to translate for any non-Australians who might be reading. Square brackets to denote correct spelling... because I'm really an ignoramus...

The mobile phone (Celphone [er... "cell phone", I've been told it's spelt]). The telephone that you can take anywhere without needing 20 kilometres (twelve and half miles) of extension cord. The other such perk is that they’re also prone to giving you a bit of a tumour.

Of course, the mobile phone (celphone [er... "cell phone", I've been told it's spelt]) rant has been done by all and sundry, due to either their annoying ringtones, or the fact that they serve as an impediment to someone’s driving ability. Naturally, in order to log other people’s derisory observations, I’ve given my mobile a ringtone that sounds like a car horn and someone swearing.

However it might change after accidentally leaving it on during a movie (film). Nothing breaks the masterfully created awe of The Aviator like, “Beep, beep! Move the fuck over arsehole (asshole)!”

But I digress.

The only problem that I have with mobile phones (celphones [er... "cell phones", I've been told it's spelt]) these days is that you simply cannot walk through a crowded area without nearly crashing into someone who has their face buried in their phone as they fervently construct an all-important SMS (text message).

Naturally, I also have a problem that girls with long hair also do this, and I can’t sneak a peek at their faces due to it falling gracefully in the way so that they look like that chick from The Ring. You know... the freaky one. But it’s not that much of a problem, being a legs man, myself.


Like my new hairdo? It came free with my mobile phone (celphone ["cell phone"])

I’m digressing, again.

But when a tool’s purpose is solely to promote easy communication with friends, family, business associates, clients, colleagues, and exes at 4am, it’s a little surprising that they seem to be blinding people to the world around them.

I passed a friend of mine in Rundle Mall (crappy strip of shops in Adelaide), and she was so enamoured with typing out her SMS (text message) that she didn’t notice me walking next to her, or even when I said her name. Hell, I could’ve smacked her over the head with an aluminium (aluminum) bar, and she would’ve continued on with her “wht u wnt 2 do 4 dnr? c u l8r.” (*error: cannot translate*)

And people whinged (complained) that the Internet promoted anti-social behaviour…

Pfft. (Whatever)