The Asylum’s World of Hypocrisy

Welcome to the lovely phase of my life in where I stop and consider exactly why you cannot take some things to heart: because the world ain’t fucking fair.

If someone is cracking onto my partner by using flirty language and asking her if she’s been “into [him]”, I cannot request that he not speak with her like that because that makes me a jealous bastard.
If I am speaking to someone’s girlfriend about anything, I must stop… because I am obviously cracking onto them.

If someone else acts stupid, it is because they are behaving the “way they are”
If I act stupid, I must learn to grow up and control myself.

Speaking about sex is witty and humourous.
If I speak about sex, I am being vulgar and offensive.

No-one person is perfect, so I must keep that in mind and accept their quirks.
I am not perfect, therefore I must have my faults highlighted at every moment, and I must change myself.

I must tolerate being snubbed by those who don’t deem me worthy. That is the way they are.
I cannot snub people who hurt me, as being able to forgive makes me the “better person”.

If someone assumes that I am doing something untoward, I must apologise for giving them that impression.
If I assume someone is doing something untoward, I am being needlessly presumptuous, and must apologise for not giving people benefit of the doubt.

Everyone else is adventurous.
I am needlessly impulsive.

Everyone else is eloquent and intelligent.
I am verbose and condescending.

Everyone else is fine the way they are.
I need to improve myself.

Everyone else is frustrated at all the pressure they’re under.
I am an angry man.

People who have a less than favourable impression of me are entitled to their opinion, and I must ignore the way they spread fallacious rumours about me.
I am far too judgmental

I must learn to see other peoples’ points of view and listen to their expectations.
I cannot demand too much of others

I must respect my fellow humans
I must earn respect

I sometimes wonder if this is all worth it. Is the socializing and requirement for acceptance really worth all the heartache, judgment, sorrow, confrontation, jealousies, group regulations, and interpretations of these rules?

Because for all the happiness and good times I’ve shared with people, it seems that they’re fleeting moments. Like a butterfly that flutters by, it entrances you for a moment with its beauty, only to disappear from view with the reminder that the creature will die in a matter of days.

I simply feel exhausted at the idea of having to stand up for my convictions when no one seems to give a shit.

Perhaps everyone feels the way I do right now, but simply do not feel the need to vent it out there. Maybe I should learn to understand my lot in this life.

Right now, though? Well, I happy being pissed off. I think I’m entitled to it every now and then.